Loosing someone that you love is always hard! What does it mean for the rest of your life? Where does this new path take you and are you prepared to walk it alone?
I never imagined loosing Edward and to me that sounds so silly. I know that life ends and your soul begins it's journey. But being selfish as we all tend to be I wanted him here with me forever. The thought of not hearing his voice, not feeling his arms around me as I sleep, laughing at his corny jokes, his deep voice as he sung to me, it just doesn't register.
I believe that there is a force stronger than man with the power of GOD that holds our sanity in his hands. To allow your heart to feel all of what you've lost would be unbearable. I believe that you receive doses as you become stronger. Once your heart heals you look back and realize what that person meant to you and what your role was in their life.
So many have asked am I mad at GOD? Am I questioning his works? The truth is I feel as though GOD had bigger plans for Edward and his heart was just too big to remain here on earth.
The part that makes my soul smile is that I was there in the end and I have our secret world stored in my heart's memory bank for the rest of my days.
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