Tracks of my tears...

Tears are powerful
They could mean that you’re sad
They could mean that you’re happy
They could mean that you’re confused
They could mean that you’re scared
They could mean that you’re tired
Whatever draws tears from your eyes is important in that moment
So often we try to hide what’s going on inside of us
We play off serious situations by making silly jokes
We mask our pain with anger to hide the fact that we’re hurting
We mask our vulnerability with confidence to protect ourselves
No matter what you try to do, your tell is your tears
Try working with the emotions instead of fighting them
Try expressing what’s going on inside instead of trying to redirect people from the truth
It’s so much easier to just be transparent than to try to be complex
In the end your complexity only leaves you alone, broken, and afraid
Sometimes a good cry makes it all better and allows someone to step in where they’re needed

Love

It’s a serious decision
It’s a deeper connection
It’s a life altering addition
It’s a fear of change
It’s a fear of falling
It’s an amazing idea
It’s a beautiful surprise
It’s an annoying situation
It’s the constant flow of tears from your eyes
So many takes on the same thing will drive you crazy or insane
Listening to others won’t give you the truth behind falling in love
Everyone is different so that means their experience will be also
If he’s standing in front of you offering his heart but all you can think about is what other people told you about this moment…chances are it isn't him that’s not ready, it’s you
Life is short and before you know it, life is done
Do you really want to be standing alone trying to be so overly cautious?
Do you really want to be standing alone crying to everyone about the impossibility of love?
So many people trash the idea of love
So many people give you their take on it
I would have you take a moment to really think for yourself
Love isn't the problem, it’s the connection
It takes you and the other person to make it work
So stop being a follower and become a leader of your own heart
If you happen to get hurt…so what! That’s life! You learn and you keep it moving
Don’t be left behind when love is all around you

He

As he sleeps I watch him quietly
The way he breathes
The way he twitches his nose
That funny face he makes
Then that moment when he feels for me and once he feels my body he smiles and drifts back to sleep
He is my everything
He is my anything
He is the one that makes me smile from the inside
That glow you see isn’t from me alone
He thinks of me often and never lets me forget it
Text messages just to say “I love you” or “Thinking about you baby”
Of the gifts that life can bring, it’s amazing how someone that never knew me before suddenly knows me more than anyone
He ensures that I never second-guess myself
He becomes upset when I forget how special I am
When I feel like falling down, he uses his strong arms to embrace me
When I feel like giving up he fuels me with encouragement
He’s more than my friend, my man, my Boo, my shoulder, my ear, the voice of reason
He is the very fabric of life and what he does to my soul is indescribable

Just Venting...

I have come to the conclusion that in life you come to the end of the road with people. It can be family, your mate, a friend, or an associate. When you realize that you’ve done all that you can and they still can’t appreciate you, you got to cut them off. When you are focused on trying to make a relationship work with people at the expense of ruining your relationship with others, you are doing yourself a disservice and it’s time to change that. Know in your heart that you’ve done your part and you are merely fed up with being used and taken for granted. No more feeling guilty about the decisions you’ve made, just move on and live your life. There are people in your life that have been there for you and will continue to be there for you. If you have dropped the ball on those relationships, acknowledge it and then fix it. Keep the ones around you that love and respect you. Cut off the ones that may love you but just don’t appreciate you. Just as their lives are important to them, so should your life be important to you. I make that vow to myself and I pray that God will touch my intentions and cover them with his blessings. I do not do anything out of hate or anger, I do what I do out of love. So when I’ve done enough, there isn’t much more for me to prove to anyone.

Also, if you’ve chosen a path to walk with God that means you must acknowledge your previous walk. You can’t treat people as if they are dispensable to you and then expect them to just go with the flow. If God is putting on your heart to change and do the right thing, the right thing will make you humble and strong enough to face the decisions that you’ve made over the years. You always face what you’ve done in order to learn from it and become a better person. Being a Christian doesn’t mean you are free from your wrongs, it means that you are ready to face them so that you can be delivered from them. I never claim to be a perfect individual or even a Christian but I know enough to walk the walk and show who I am by what I do and not just what I say. I learned that from living and facing my decisions, not getting a degree online.

Listening and Learning

As important as it is to speak your mind
It is equally important to listen carefully to what is being said to you
We at times are so ready to say what we need to say
In those moments we aren't allowing our ears to work for us
There isn't always a wrong and right
There are moments when you can reach a compromise to agree to disagree
It's in that moment you can see how mature you truly are
The ability to take in what someone feels and accept it despite the fact that it doesn't agree with what you feel, is a true sign of maturity
We can be a little selfish in our thinking and in our beliefs
Sharing your feelings with someone that has different ideals and a different outlook can be fruitful for the both of you
Allow someone to give you their interpretation of any giving situation
That gives you an opportunity to step outside of your own comfort zone
Standing on your soap box only gives you a view that is solely yours
However, the world doesn't operate on the vision of you alone
In that thinking you will be able to receive and respect other people's differences and build a stronger connection to people in general
We all want to be heard and at times we just want to sit back and listen
Learn to do both when the time is right
You'll be surprised as to how many people will enjoy talking to you

The Rain

It's a rainy day
The sounds of the rain hits your roof, windows, porch, and grounds
It's soothing and it's calming
You sit there staring outside
While you stare you feel emotions running through you like air
The calm relaxes you enough for you to think
Your mind clears
Your worries, doubts, anxieties, fears, and concerns seem to wash away like the dirt from the rain water
As that happens you become aware of a clarity
You start to think about what you should do, over something you decided that turned out badly or just not the way you intended
That decision could be a friend, lover, job, action or thought
No matter what it is, the rain has calmed you enough to make a decision that could change your life
Think about that for a moment...
Something as ordinary as rain falling has got you thinking about life
Something that you see all the time and may never have taken the time to pay attention to has such a powerful influence over you
Is it the rain that has you this way?
Is it the sounds that have made you contemplate?
Or is it just you finally taking the time to listen to yourself for change?
Maybe the rain stopped you from running out in the streets to distract you from thinking
Maybe the rain is a force that makes you slow down long enough to do some self evaluation and inventory
Whatever the case, you are thinking things through now
Don't waste this moment trying to get out of dealing with something that obviously requires your attention
To make it simpler, just accept the rain and the power behind it
Just stay seated and listen to it
Take in the soothing sensation
Go back into your mind and work out what needs to be worked out
Some times it's better just to deal and not try to understand

LIVE!!!!!!

It doesn't matter at what point you figure it out
It just matters that you get it
There are so many life lessons to take in and at times it can seem overwhelming or impossible to know enough to survive the world
The world its self can be very intimidating
You go through most of your life unaware of what's out there
Then you spend the rest of your life trying to merely survive what you've discovered
People aren't any different
You meet people and for the most part they have nothing but good intentions
Then again there are those "other people" that are out to get something from you or simply to just get you
If you have met those "other people" you start to make it almost impossible for anyone to get close to you again
In some ways that's a good way to be
In other ways it only gives the power of who you are or would become to those that hurt you
Never give your power of self to someone that didn't deserve it anyway
Don't beat yourself up about the past
There isn't anything left for you to try to do about what has been done
You just learn from it and apply what you've learned to your future
When people come into your life after you've dealt with the past, you are more in-tuned with the signs that let you know what this person's intentions truly are
You get a sense of what people are and who they are
Gathering this information helps you pick the right people to be in your life
When you think about it, it's all a learning experience
So why would you fear anything?
Why would you dare to push yourself out there?
At some point the four walls that you hide behind will need to come down
Trying to stay protected is only a sure way of being hurt in the long run
The only way a child can become immune to germs and other worldly ailments is if they go out into the world to allow their bodies to develop what it needs to strengthen its self
So why is it not the same when it comes to life in general
Stop scaring yourself into a hole and start building more room for more life
When it's all said and done, you can say that you've done it all